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Jerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka), 1859-1927

"Novel Notes"

Men settle their 'affairs
of honour' in the law courts, and return home wounded only in the pocket.
Assaults on unprotected females are confined to the slums, where heroes
do not dwell, and are avenged by the nearest magistrate. Your modern
burglar is generally an out-of-work green-grocer. His 'swag' usually
consists of an overcoat and a pair of boots, in attempting to make off
with which he is captured by the servant-girl. Suicides and murders are
getting scarcer every season. At the present rate of decrease, deaths by
violence will be unheard of in another decade, and a murder story will be
laughed at as too improbable to be interesting. A certain section of
busybodies are even crying out for the enforcement of the seventh
commandment. If they succeed authors will have to follow the advice
generally given to them by the critics, and retire from business
altogether. I tell you our means of livelihood are being filched from us
one by one. Authors ought to form themselves into a society for the
support and encouragement of crime."
MacShaughnassy's leading intention in making these remarks was to shock
and grieve Brown, and in this object he succeeded. Brown is--or was, in
those days--an earnest young man with an exalted--some were inclined to
say an exaggerated--view of the importance and dignity of the literary
profession.


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