He was a seriously inclined young man, and once, in the course of a
casual conversation upon the subject of love, he was heard to say that he
himself should never be attracted by mere beauty and charm. What would
appeal to him, he said, would be a woman's goodness--her charity and
kindliness to the poor.
"Well, that set the petticoats all thinking. They saw that in studying
fashion plates and practising expressions they had been going upon the
wrong tack. The card for them to play was 'the poor.' But here a
serious difficulty arose. There was only one poor person in the whole
parish, a cantankerous old fellow who lived in a tumble-down cottage at
the back of the church, and fifteen able-bodied women (eleven girls,
three old maids, and a widow) wanted to be 'good' to him.
"Miss Simmonds, one of the old maids, got hold of him first, and
commenced feeding him twice a day with beef-tea; and then the widow
boarded him with port wine and oysters. Later in the week others of the
party drifted in upon him, and wanted to cram him with jelly and
chickens.
"The old man couldn't understand it. He was accustomed to a small sack
of coals now and then, accompanied by a long lecture on his sins, and an
occasional bottle of dandelion tea. This sudden spurt on the part of
Providence puzzled him.
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