But we mutually forbore to mention the occasion of my illness; and I
complied with her advice to take some refreshment, and retire to my
chamber. I am so much fatigued by the exertions of the day that rest is
absolutely necessary; and I lay aside my pen to seek it.
_Friday morning_.--When I shall again receive the balmy influence of
sleep, I know not. It has absolutely forsaken me at present. I have had
a most restless night. Every awakening idea presented itself to my
imagination; whether I had sustained a real loss in Mr. Boyer's
departure, reflections on my own misconduct, with the censure of my
friends, and the ill-natured remarks of my enemies, excited the most
painful anxiety in my mind.
I am going down; but how shall I see my mamma? To her I will confess my
faults, in her maternal breast repose my cares, and by her friendly
advice regulate my conduct. Had I done this before, I might have escaped
this trouble, and saved both her and myself many distressing emotions.
_Friday evening_'.--I have had a long conversation with my mamma, which
has greatly relieved my mind. She has soothed me with the most endearing
tenderness.
Mr. Atkins, with whom Mr. Boyer lodged while in town, called here this
afternoon. I did not see him; but he told my mamma that Mr. Boyer had
returned home, and left a letter for me, which he had promised to convey
with his own hand.
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