He even accused me of indifference towards him, and of
partiality to another. Major Sanford, he believed, was the man who
robbed him of the affection which he had supposed his due. He warned me
against any intercourse with him, and insisted that I must renounce the
society of the one or the other immediately.
He would leave me, he said, this evening, and call to-morrow to know the
result of my determination. It was late before he bade me good night,
since which I have written these particulars. It is now time to lay
aside my pen, and deliberate what course to take.
_Wednesday evening_.--Last night I closed not my eyes. I rose this
morning with the sun, and went into the garden till breakfast. My mamma
doubtless saw the disorder of my mind, but kindly avoided any inquiry
about it. She was affectionately attentive to me, but said nothing of my
particular concerns. I mentioned not my embarrassment to her. She had
declared herself in favor of Mr. Boyer; therefore I had no expectation
that she would advise impartially. I retired to my chamber, and
remained in a kind of revery for more than an hour, when I was roused by
the rattling of a carriage at the door. I hastened to the window, and
saw Major Sanford just driving away. The idea of his having been to
converse with my mamma gave me new sensations. A thousand perplexities
occurred to my mind relative to the part most proper for me to act in
this critical situation.
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