And suddenly I heard it, a low,
murmurous cry, unutterably doleful.
"O God--O God--I want to be dead--I want to be dead!"
So I turned aside and, following the path, saw it ended at a frowning
doorway set within a high and sinister wall; and recognising this
door, this high wall and gloomy wood, I felt myself cold with that
indefinable sense of impending evil which this desolate place had
awoke in me before--
"O kind God--if I could only die!"
Going in among the trees I saw a shape of misery outstretched
face-down upon the sodden earth, a shape that wrung pale hands and
writhed in awful manner. Trembling, I sank on one knee beside her.
"Woman!" said I, laying hand lightly on her shoulder.
"Child!"
She raised a haggard face, its youthful beauty distorted by horror,
its pallid cheeks stained with mire, and I blenched before the look in
these wide eyes.
"Don't touch me!" she whispered hoarsely. "Don't look at me--I can't
abide it--go away--let me die--"
"Child, where is your home?"
"None!" she whispered. "None! I durs'n't go back ... now. Oh, never no
more ... they made me drunk ... when I woke ... ah, don't look at me
... I wish the sun 'ud go out for ever ... If I could only die!... I
fought them as long as I could.... Oh, kill me, God.... I want to be
dead ... but I want Tom first ... my Tom ... I want him to know 't
weren't ... my fault. O Tom dear, Tom as I loved ... how can I tell
'ee.
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