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Reade, Charles, 1814-1884

"Hard Cash"

That is your delusion, that and the
itch for going out shopping; oh, I'm down on you. Mamma dear, you open
that gigantic wardrobe of yours; and I'll oil my hair, white-wash my mug
(a little moan from Mrs. D.) and do the counterjumping business to the
life; hand the things down to you, unrol 'em, grin, charge you 100 per
cent over value, note them down in a penny memorandum-book, sing out
'Caesh! Caesh!' &c. &c.: and so we shall get all Julia wants, and go
through the ritual of shopping without the substantial disgrace of
running in debt."
Mrs. Dodd smiled admiringly, as ladies generally do at the sauciness of a
young male; but proposed an amendment. She would open her wardrobe, and
look out all the contents for Edward's inspection; and, if the mere sight
of them did not convince him they were inappropriate to a bride, why then
she would coincide with his views, and resign her own.
"All right!" said he. "That will take a jolly time, I know; so I'll go to
my governor first for the bonnet and wreath."
Mrs. Dodd drew in at this last slang word; she had heard young gentlemen
apply it to their fathers.


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